A healthy mind = A healthy body

Talk about an Emotional Roller Coaster this month has really been stressful for me and my family and it all started on:

Thursday August 20, 2009 at 8:00pm.
I get a phone call stating that my sister had been arrested for being at the wrong place a the wrong time and can be facing some serious time behind some dudes that set her up to pick up a package from a house and when she got there the FBI was there and arrested her. She got out the same night but now the guys think she will snitch, but knowing her she won't and she will take the fall for 15lbs. of marijuana through FedEx. The bad thing is she has 5 kids that will suffer if she do the time, but if she snitch she's screwed cause that's a lot of years which can cause the dudes to want to harm her if she tell and we all know the police won't protect her and her kids!

Wednesday August 26, 2009 at 10:00 am.
I missed my job interview because the car was leaking oil and smoking really bad and it was also the 1 year anniversary of my niece's loosing their father who was Murdered in Boston.

Thursday August 27, 2009 at 7:00 am.
My husband's car caught fire on his way to work now the stress really kick in cause my car gave out back in March and now his, so we had no car!

Friday August 28, 2009 at 8:30 am.
I had a dental appointment scheduled to remove my wisdom tooth and I also had a job interview scheduled for 10:00 am. At, 9:15am I was still sitting in the waiting room so I rescheduled my appointment. I called my ride then I noticed I had forgot the address and directions for my interview at home so I called them and got the info from them. About 20minutes into the ride I called to let them to let them know I was on my way and if I was heading in the right direction and the guy told me I was going the wrong way so turn around and I did, but he was wrong! The whole time I was going the right way so I was 45 minutes late for my interview however, I am happy to say they waited for me and I also got hired. When I came out of my interview my husband called to let me know that he had gotten approved for the car loan and we was getting our car and sure enough he pulled up in our first new shinny car!!!! All is good, right?

Sunday August 30, 2009 at 11:00am.
My husband's football game starts and within 15 minutes of playing he collided with another player head on and had to go to the hospital. They gave him a CT-Scan and we found out he fractured 7 bones in his face(his upper jaw bone, his sinus bones, and his temporal bone) and may need surgery. His pain was unbearable.

Monday August 31, 2009 at 9:00am.
We met with the maxillofacial specialist but he didn't handle fractures of this extent so he referred us to his partner so that means another appointment. At 10:00am I had my wisdom tooth pulled and a fill-in done. After that appointment we had to be at the Eye Dr. at 12:00pm to make sure there was no damage done to his eye I am glad to say his eye was not damaged.

Wednesday September 2, 2009 at 10:00 am.
Another fill-in(my poor mouth).

Thursday September 3, 2009 at 9:00 am.
We went to the maxillofacial surgent and found out that his fractures were really serious and he had to have surgery which was scheduled for September 9th. We were hoping he wouldn't have to have the surgery, but they were concerned about his eye sinking back and him having permanent double vision the swelling was actually helping his eye to stay in place. We also had to go to the Eye Dr. and to his primary care Dr. to get blood drawn before his surgery.

Friday September 4, 2009 at 8:30 am.
He had to have more CT-Scans done it was 9:45am and he still wasn't done so I had to leave him and my son at the hospital because I had a 10:00am appointment to sign my son up for daycare. When I got to my appointment after signing all the papers and thinking I was all set I found out that my employer never faxed my income verification form so he lost his spot. So, then I had to race back to the hospital to pick them up which they had been waiting for an hour because I never told them I was leaving, I was suppose to be waiting out side until they gave him his CT-Scan disk but when I saw the time I pulled off because I couldn't miss the appointment and you see how it turned out! Then he had an appointment for a physical which had to be done before he got the surgery and because we didn't have the $30 copay they refused to see him so we had to reschedule.

Monday September 7, 2009 at 7:00 am.
My husband returned to work but he also had two appointments scheduled for that day after work, his eye appointment and his physical which all went well! And my sister had her first court date which the case was continued for another date.

Wednesday September 9, 2009 at 7:00 am.
My first day of work, I got out at 9:00am and then picked up my husband to take him to his surgery. It was scheduled for 12:00pm and he was very nervous all he kept saying was "I want you to be the first person I see when I wake up then I'll be fine". I even made sure I wore his favorite color (he loves me in pink). I stayed with him until they took him into the Operating Room then I went back to work until 4:00 pm afterwards I rushed straight to the hospital and when I got there he had just came out of surgery. I was standing there looking at him when he opened his eyes and he started humming the "Pink Panther" song (lol) then he lifted his hand to give me a high five because I had kept my promise that when he opened his eyes I would be there, then he passed back out for the next two hours then I took him home.

Thursday September 10, 2009 at 12:00 am.
My baby boy turned 5 years old and we couldn't celebrate his birthday because we had no money because it all went to co payments and prescription fees! It hurt me not to be able to acknowledge my son's birthday especially his 5th.

Saturday September 12, 2009 at 11:00 am.
My youngest son gets sick Fever, stuffy nose, and achenes he was just miserable.

Monday September 14, 2009 at 7:00 am.
My oldest son gets sick Fever, stuffy nose, achenes same ol' same.

Saturday September 19, 2009 at 7:00 am.
My husband returned to work, I still couldn't find childcare for my son so my hopes of keeping my new job starts to fade. Then I started my Period and to top it all off I felt the cold forming in my system. I thought to myself "finally, I can get the chance to rest" and then my husband came home and he was sick so, I was back on duty! You know moms can't get sick in peace (lol) I had to suck up what I was going through to take care of my family. I was making soup, giving medicine, rubbing Vick's on their chest and backs, just making sure they were comfortable.

Monday September 21, 2009 at 6:00 am.
I woke up feeling horrible and the stress had kicked in high gear because I was overwhelmed with everything that was going on especially trying to find affordable childcare for my son in enough time so I wouldn't have to give up my job.

Tuesday September 22, 2009 at 1:22 am.
I get a call from my sister and she was scared because the dude that set her up showed up at her house unannounced 2 nights before and now he was calling her asking her if she had court soon and she said "yes" and he said "I'm coming to see you" that was at 11:00pm but she feel asleep but woke up in a panic at 1:20am because she said she had to let someone know what was going on in case they tried to hurt her so she called me"Of course after that call I couldn't sleep and I had work in the morning.

Wednesday September 23, 2009 at 7:00 am.
I was feeling like crap and had to go to work then I get a phone call from my supervisor about some lie a lady at one of the programs told her so she called me yelling and I guess all the stress took a toll on me because I had enough and let my emotions get the best of me and flipped out! I was just done with all the Bull Shit you know, so I left work early and went home and got some rest then my friend called me and I told her everything I had been going through and how I had to give up my job because of lack of childcare and she said "girl you are stressed and you need a therapist"(lol) then she treated me to a pedicure which is the next best thing. I felt really relaxed after and went home and went to bed.

My point of sharing my situation with you all is to show you that when your mind is not healthy your body is not healthy, all the running around and stressing took over me and although I have faith in god, at times I just felt lost and alone. One day I was so overwhelmed that I didn't want to come home. I drove around really slow and I wanted to pull over and just sit in the car but I had been gone for hours and I didn't want my family to worry, so I went home. I felt so bad because in the whole 7 years I've been with my family I never felt that way before and I didn't understand why I was feeling this way. I know we go through a lot in our lives and we are suppose to stay strong and never show your weak side but I couldn't take it anymore and like my mom said I'm only human it's ok, but hopefully next month will bring less stress and frustrations!

The System!!!

As a young mother I had to depend on the welfare system I had food stamps, cash benefits, and vouchers for child care services I even had W.I.C. , but it was also my goal to get off welfare when I was stable enough too. I always wanted to do what was best for myself and my children I never wanted to be on welfare but unfortunately I allowed myself to become an statistic by being young single mother. I went to school to better myself, and I was also bless to meet my husband who had once lived a fast life but just wanted to settle down and have a family. He his a very hard working man working 50 plus hours a week to provide for his family I see how much he works and it makes me want to reach out and help. The type of work he do takes a lot of energy, he's in charge of over 100 employees not to mention all the guest who dine at his place of employment. I know he would love to dedicate more of his time to his family which made me determined to help him, so I searched and searched all year until I got a job last Friday. The good news is I found work the bad news is, it's a pain in the ass to work and afford childcare. I have been searching all this week for a school to put my 5 year old son, he would have been going to Kindergarten this year but the cut off date is September 1st and his birthday is September 10th so he missed it by 9 days. So, he only qualifies for the pre-school program which is 3 hours long and other childcare centers won't take him when he get out from pre-school program at the local public school they want him to come to their program full-time but it's like $190 a week and with the jobs that are available now, you'll be lucky to make that much weekly. So, I been having a hard time, but I finally found a place that will take him full-time and they will go by a sliding scale fee so it shouldn't be too expensive. The reason I brought this story up is because as a woman who was on welfare and worked hard to get off, I started to notice that when you are on welfare you get everything handed to you and that's why all these woman are not motivated to get off because you loose all the resources when you are not part of "The System". It's like the government is discouraging people from living the family life, because either way you have to make huge sacrifices when you do it without "The System", you have to sacrifice the money or the family. And, this is what I mean: in order to afford the necessities you have to work a lot of hours and see your family less which can cause problems, but if you say forget it I'm spending time with my family you loose the money to support them". Then when you are trying to share the responsibility as a couple it's like they block you from the resources you need to be successful by saying"Oh you make to much", but have you noticed they never tell you how much more you make over the qualifying limit. This is just my opinion you may feel different maybe you are not having such a difficult time like I am having, either way help a sister out if you know another way to get help without hustling "The System". At one time I was thankful for "The System" now I just think they make it easy for women to keep making babies and suck up all the extra funds that can help people that really want to work and make a better situation for their families but, instead they give the funds to the women who just want to get their nails done, buy sneakers, buy their baby daddies big chains, and just sit around and do nothing! Right now I am pissed at "The System" us hard working people need help too we got goals and dreams and although we have some money we can still use a little more because you have to remember when signing up for these resources to get extra help they always go by the Gross Income Amount not the Net Income which is a few hundred dollars less which is a lot when you really don't have it!!!!!! I know there are some people out there that can relate I'm just asking you to share your situation with me and let me know how you made it work, I thought about having a friend watch him but my husband doesn't feel comfortable with her watching him which makes me feel uncomfortable, but I have to work! But, he feels it will end in drama or her being greedy and needy!!! And the people that I am able to trust is very limited so what can a sister do???????? PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!